Random Rantings

Alternatively titled:

I hate Rhode Island Drivers

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Hey you! Yeah you, behind the wheel of that guided missile. You're an ass. You are a danger to yourself and those around you. I don't appreciate that two of the people in your immediate vicinity are me and my son. I have some driving tips and wisdom I'd like to impart to you my friend...

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Blinkers are NOT optional. They warn people you are entering their lane and turning right immediately thereafter.

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You may not drive for any length of time with your hazard lights on. Their sole purpose is to alert people to your presence on the SIDE of the road so they do not hit you.

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I don't care how much you honk your horn. I will not proceed through the green light until there is space for me on the other side. I will NOT block the intersection and get stuck there when the other light turns green because you are an impatient jerk. P.S. Calling me a "Douche bag" will not help your case!

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Driving + texting= probable accident. This is NOT ok. Enough said.

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When you enter the highway, be mindful that 30 mph is NOT the current speed of traffic and you may get rear ended by one of the a fore mentioned people who is in a big freakin hurry.

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When you pull into a parking lot, it is pretty much a bitch move to park diagonally in 2 spaces. You are not the president or freaking king of anywhere so park within the lines like the rest of us.

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When you happen to see an ambulance coming up behind you, the correct thing to do is pull to the right as quickly and safely as possible. Pulling to the side of the road is not to be confused with freeze tag in which you stop in your tracks, causing the ambulance to honk and try to get around you.

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Read up on how the whole stop sign thing works too please. Ok??

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I know these things seem self explanatory, but we all need a gentle reminding from time to time. Please don't make me stoop to your level and scream profanities out of my window, because I'm almost there.

Not Me! Monday

Ok. I give in. I am not perfect. I try to be, but I mess up from time to time. Join me over at MckMama's and let's all share what makes us human this week!

I have not been semi-boycotting the whole Not Me thing when it used to be my favorite post of the week. I didn't feel immense pressure to come up with a witty intro and instead just decide not to write a post rather than let down my readers. I am not that petty. Nope, not me!
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We are planting two vegetable and herb gardens in our yard. We got the raised beds all set up last weekend and were supposed to go get the plants for them. We did not stupidly bring Natey to the farm to get the seedlings:

1. At 5 pm when we were all hungry starving
2. When the sky looked like it was about to open up and poor down rain

We did not begin to put plants on a cart only to get frustrated by the fact that Nate was pulling seedlings out by the roots, having a fit about being strapped into the stroller, and demanding food. We did not proceed to put all of the plants back and then leave without anything to go eat. At least we wised up yesterday and dropped the kid off at the grandparents for an hour so we could get what we needed in peace.We were not so embarrassed by the whole incident that we went to a different farm the next day.
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I did not go the entire day yesterday and forget I was pregnant until someone brought up the possibility of being hung over after a wedding we will be going to in July. I didn't stare at her blankly for a moment and then remind her that I will in fact NOT be hung over since I will not be drinking. She didn't feel like an idiot since she also knows I am pregnant.
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My well behaved insane, almost 2 year old, did not announce to the whole restaurant we were eating at that he was pooping. I did not very quietly remind him that he was tooting, not pooping and that he should say excuse me. He didn't proceed to yell, "Cuse me. I'm tootin". At this point I did not give up and sit there red in the face and smile at anyone who was staring.
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What did you "not" do this week?

Opinions please

So Aaron calls me at work today and says, "Do you think you could make Nathan's birthday invitations today so we can mail them out tomorrow?" I'm sorry, what?? I do have to do a little thing called work when I'm at work, so I snottily nicely told him no, but I would get to it tonight. Now, I might be able to sew, but honestly I am not that creative. It really takes me much time and effort to pull what tiny amount of creativity I may have out and get it to make sense.

Here is the first draft of Natey's invitation. Please give me any advice or constructive criticism if you think it can be improved.

Keep in mind that our address will be under the date, I just left it off of this version for obvious reasons! I need to order them tomorrow so gimme your thoughts, and in Aaron fashion, I need them now! ;o)

Natey at 23 Months

Oh my little man. I am amazed that in 31 short days you will be turning 2. I actually had to focus on not freaking out as I typed that. It seems like an impossibility to me, yet it is the truth. Dang! That means I have 1 month to plan your birthday party, clean up the back yard and open the pool! For now, I will just distract myself thinking of all of the wonderful, hilarious, strange and new things you have picked up this month.

• I'm starting to wonder if Dora is such a bad thing since she has taught you so much freakin Spanish! Some of my favorites are your responses to these:

When someone says gracias you sweetly say, "De nada!"

You reply "muy bien" when Auntie Pamme asks you "como estas?".

• You apparently know a little Chinese too as you can say "Ni hao" (hi), "Xie xie" (thank you) and "tway" (push). My favorite part is you tilt your head to the side and touch your chin to your shoulder when you say these things. It melts me every time!

• You crack me up with some of the things you come up with. You went to the zoo and saw the bats in their cave and now every time we turn the light off in your room or you put the blanket over your head you say, "I see bats!". You don't seem afraid when you say this so I don't think I will worry about it just yet.

• I love your new obsession with finding life in the back yard. Worms, birds, "slugas", rolly polies, you love them all. I just have to watch you closely so you don't inadvertently squish them.

• You are starting to get the plural of items. You add an s where appropriate and have started to say our, "our house", "our car" are some things you like to say a lot.


• You are starting to call things your "favorite". I'm pretty sure you get it because the things you mention are definitely on the top of your list. For example: "T-rex my favorite dinosaur". This I know to be true.

• One of your truly favorite things is after you eat dinner. I clean off your high chair and you and daddy play blastoff. Daddy shakes your tray and you count really fast, "1, 2, 3, 4, 5, BLASTOFF" and then daddy spins your highchair around. This is something only a daddy would do. I am too afraid you might puke your dinner all over me, but you love it and scream and giggle with glee.

• On the negative side you have figured out that boo boos hurt. You obsess about it and say over and over again, "Boo boo hurts. I need (trans)former band aid. I need mecine". For the longest time I thought you were saying farmer band aid, but then daddy taught you the song which is hilarious when you sing it. "(Trans)Farmers, more than meets de guy". That's what it sounds like anyway.

• You have started singing songs on your own now. You don't know all of the words, but you don't care. Sometimes you skip them or mumble them and keep going with the words you know. I will have to get your renditions of Yankee Doodle, Baa Baa Black sheep, and Itsy Bitsy spider on video and post them so everyone can get a chuckle.

• You get the concept of "just a minute". When you aren't ready to get out of bed or off of the toilet you say, "Lay down minute" or "pee pee toilet minute".

• I can't count how many times a day I hear, "I found it" out of your mouth. Even if I hand something to you, you proudly hold it up and say you found it.

• You are finally sleeping sans the sleep sack and are using a blanket now. I can't say that you keep covered or know how to cover yourself back up when you get all tangled, but it's a start.

• You slept on a cot for the first time the other day when you had to go to big daycare for a day. I was so proud of you since I had my doubts when I dropped you off. I'm still glad you go to a home daycare where you get your own room and pack n play to sleep in, but it makes me feel more confident that you might do well in a big boy bed when the baby comes.

• You have all but your 2 year molars and will be going to the dentist for the first time next month. Let's hope that goes smoothly.

• Your feet are huge kiddo. You are in a 7 1/2 already. Please slow down. Toddler shoes are not cheap and I'd like to get some more use out of the ones you have!

If I sat here long enough I could fill pages and pages about all of the things you do every day, but I'll end there for now. I'm a little sad that next month I will have to tell people you are 2. My baby will be officially a boy in my mind and I guess I just wanted to hold on to your babiness a little longer. I love you Nathan Fraank Fraanks!

Love, Mommy Fox and Daddy Wolf (how do you come up with this stuff???)

I'm still here

I've just been laying low. After I vented a bit in my vlog, I started to realize why I was having such a hard time last week keeping my cool. Mother's Day was on the horizon. I know I should have been all thrilled and everything, because I am a mom after all, but it is one of the hardest days for me. Since I lost my mother, my best friend, some days just aren't the same. I want to call my mom on mother's day. I want to send her flowers or give her a picture that Natey has colored. I want to take her out to brunch and go get pedicures. I miss her and it isn't fading with time like I thought it would. The pain is still as raw as the day I lost her.

My Mother's day wasn't the restful day that I thought I wanted either. Up at 7, out of the house by 8. Breakfast with my boys, a stop at one set of in-laws, Lowes to get the rest of the materials for my veggie gardens, built the raised bed frames, dug for worms with Natey, visit to second in-laws, stop at Home Depot since we forgot something at Lowes. Natey down for a nap, 2 1/2 hours of getting the raised beds set up. Showered and off to a cookout at a friend's house.

With every second of the day filled with something, I didn't have the time to wallow in my thoughts of my mom. I guess that's good and bad. I do enjoy the times I spend strolling down memory lane even if they are bitter sweet. I have been thinking a lot about baby number 2 that is growing bigger every day and even that is bitter sweet. My due date is the day my mother died. November 18th. I feel this is her gift to me. A way to take a negative day and turn it into something wonderful. That was who she was. She always smiled, even through her pain. She would want me to do the same.

On that note here is someone who always makes me smile. Disregard the hat. It was not that cold, he just found it in his closet and he looked to cute to argue.

Throwing in the towel {vlog style}

Back again for week 2 of Tim's Vlogemotions carnival. Not super excited about it as you will soon see when I share my emotion for the week. Here's goes nothing...



Ok SEE what I'm talking about people???? I freaking talked for at least another 2 minutes without realizing that my camera ran out of memory. Yeah I might have broken the 3 minute rule Tim, but you know what?? I was even slightly funny at the end (or at least I was in my mind). This is just the cherry on top of the crap sundae that has been my whole week. I guess that will teach me to leave a bunch of pics and videos on the camera and try to record. Lesson learned.

Whatever, I am just going to get over it because tomorrow is my day and I am going to take advantage. I'm sleeping in. I'm not cleaning anything. I'm not making a meal. I'm not changing a diaper. Nope, tomorrow I am recharging my batteries so I can have a better week. And as for the rest of the stuff you didn't get to hear about...forget about it. Part of it could have been an HR nightmare if anyone from work happened to stumble upon my blog anyway.

I'm throwing in the towel... good night.

I can't wait!

12 weeks
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I am not the most patient person in the world. Who am I kidding, I get anxious at the mere thought of waiting for something. If I am waiting on a phone call or email I will compulsively check my phone or inbox to see if I might have missed it. Can you say slight OCD?? So imagine me, this impatient creature, waiting 20 whole weeks before I can find out if I'm in for more snakes, snails and puppy dog tails or if I get to experience some sugar and spice and every thing nice!!

The worst part is, everyone keeps asking me if I'm going to find out. Um, hi, do you know me?? The thought of waiting the whole 40 weeks and being surprised could never even exist in my world. Yeah, I know there are so few true surprises in life and yada yada.... I have heard that so many times, and to those of you who waited, kudos. You are given Mother Theresa status in my mind.

I had full on conversations with Nathan when he was in the womb and it didn't feel right to me until I knew I was talking to him. I don't like calling my growing child baby or it. I just need to feel the connection. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't my need to name him right away. The poor kid didn't have a name for 2 days after he was born because daddy and I couldn't agree on anything.

So my question is, what are your thoughts on life's one true surprise? How many of you waited to find out until you delivered. How in the world did you stand the suspense and did you give your baby a nickname like peanut or something to avoid calling them "it"?? I also set up a poll in my sidebar so check it out. i want to see what your guess is. Please indulge me. This will help distract me for the next 8 weeks until I can find out!!

Not Me! Monday

Bless me MckMama for I have sinned.

It has been 41 days since my last Not Me! confession.

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I did {not} reveal that I'm preggers in my vlog post on Friday. I am {not} amazed that I managed to keep my huge mouth shut for a total of 11 weeks and 4 days since I was bursting at the seams to tell everyone!

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I am {not} the biggest procrastinator of all time. I did {not} reveal this to the whole bloggy world and immediately regret my post because I don't want people to think I would take my time filling my Etsy orders when that is the one thing I try to stay on top of.

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To that end, I did{n't} wait until Friday to start making my inventory for a craft show I was doing on Sunday. I did{n't} keep my exhausted pregnant tukus up until 12:45 am on Sat night finishing my goods. I did {not} kick butt and end up making 25 items in 1 1/2 days!

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I was {not} completely disgusted with the turnout for the craft show. The show was {not} completely under-advertised and in the most ridiculous location ever. In 5 hours the total amount of people who sauntered through the building was {not} roughly 40! Out of those 40 people a measly 10% were {not} of the cane sect. Out of 25 baby items (plus a diaper cake) I did {not} sell 0 (not a typo people) items. I was {not} so bored out of my mind that I wanted to go outside and jump up and down in front of the building to attract SOME kind of traffic to the show. This was{n't} my first craft show and also may {not} be my last (at least with this organizer)!!

What did you {not} do this week??

Vlogemotions Surprise!

Ok, I'm doing it. I told him I would. I even stalled until today, so Tim, here's your vlog! I'm not going to elaborate much. Just watch the video and prepare to be blown away by my inability to look at the camera, my many uses of the word um, and the awesome lighting in my dining room!

So? What do ya think? ;o)