Thursday, November 6, 2008

When a problem comes along.....

....you must ZIP it!
I hate going to the dentist, but not for the reason you might think. Sure the drills and suction-y thing aren't my favorite, but there is something I dread more than the pain in my mouth. The hygienist...

There are 2 hygienists at the office, one guy and one gal. I've had them both, but generally end up with the woman cleaning my teeth. She drives me nuts because she talks the ENTIRE time you are getting your teeth cleaned. First of all, you can't exactly talk back while some one's hands are in your mouth so I'm not sure if she expects me to answer or to simply listen as she burns a hole in my brain with her babbling. My first appointment with her was when I was pregnant. She kept asking me questions to which I kept replying, "muhnhhfluhuh." She didn't seem to notice that my answers were unintelligible and kept firing away. I had her again when I was 3 weeks in to maternity leave and exhausted beyond belief. I was tired and unfortunately had a headache when I got to the office. She started taking away and this time I just closed my eyes and didn't say anything back, at all. But this didn't stop Talky McTalkerson from continuing her one-sided conversation despite my lack of interest and/or participation.

I got to the office today dreading my visit. But then it happened; I hit the hygienist jackpot! Yes! I was so visibly excited when the guy came out and called my name that he probably thought he had a stalker. As he walked me back to the room I felt instantly better. And then I saw her, in the room across from mine, yapping her head off at the poor soul in the chair. Ahhh, but this time it is not me! Scraping and poking aside, I had a silent, wonderful cleaning. He opened the door to call the dentist in to give my teeth a once-over and I heard....

"I had a dream last night that I was on a beach. The most beautiful beach you've ever seen and I found all of the earrings I had ever lost."

Guy hygienist: "Do you want to schedule your next cleaning now?"
Me: "Sure."
Guy: "I have a 8:30 on June 8th with [crazy, talk your ear off, make you want to poke your own eyes out lady]."
Me: "Can I have you again?"
Guy: {Wierd look} "Um, sure."

I don't care if he thinks I'm a stalker. I can't do it again. It would be detrimental to my brain.

17 comments:

  1. zip it good! i hate it when they try to talk to you! and oh yeah...you're in for it with a boy. but, like mine :D, yours is adorable and it's so hard to stay mad at them when they're cute!

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  2. Oh that is too funny!! I think I would have been the same way! Maybe you flattered him!

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  3. that is hysterical...at least the way you tell it, not that she is a loony-tune, sir talk-a-lot!

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  4. I've got something started for you. Let me know what you think (be honest)

    http://lovingmomtest.blogspot.com/

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  5. Glad you don't have to have Talky McTalkerson again!! I hate that too!! The last few times, I've had a surprisingly quiet gal, who really seems to understand that I can't talk with all that crap in my mouth. It's so nice!!

    Ok, so about the blog... (sorry, this is going to be long AND random)... I told Chad when he came home for lunch about you wanting to pick his brain when you come. I told him, "Little does she know how hard it is to actually get your help." For a brief moment, I thought he was mad at my comment. But he said, "Yeah, it's like trying to pick out a mammoth from an iceberg!" : ) So true, so true. So here's my deal... I'll do most of the work for you while you're here (and we'll enlist Chad on the things I'll have probably forgotten by then), but you need to do some grunt work to see what you want, what pictures you'll want to use, etc.

    Go to www.onceuponablog.org (the one who made MckMama's) and click on the Design Kit options... the one she says is her favorite is a good one. Or the one I got mine from, Scrap Orchard (the link's on my post). You'll want to look at the Kits and start getting an idea of your color scheme, possible fonts, clip art, etc. I bought 2 kits and a paper pack from Scrap orchard. Also, start looking at different blogs (go to My Portfolio and see hers, or go to blogsbydanielle and check hers out - again, the links are in that post I did about my new blog).

    When you get here, we'll order the kit you want, download it, and start playing with it in Fireworks. But I'll need you to e-mail all of the pictures you're going to use, since I won't obviously be able to upload them.

    Do you have Fireworks or Photoshop? If so, you could do that part... but I'm kind of thinking you don't. : )

    In my header, I used 2 papers and some clip art, and then my font was just Century Gothic (the one I use for my blog). I didn't mess with creating any special fonts. I used a drop shadow on everything, which gives it that 3D element.

    You'll need pics for your header, as well as your sidebar.

    The one thing I haven't figured out (but I could as Chad) is how to get a 3-column layout. Blogger doesn't have one in Minima, and that's the template you have to use to do all of this.

    Anyway, I'm kind of excited!!! I'm not that good at capturing other people's "visions", so hopefully you'll have some ideas in mind or be open to playing around with it. The more you think of, the easier it will be to just put it all together. : ) The scrapbook kits are pretty cheap considering, so you can always mix and match!

    I'd love to do seasonal blogs, but that's just way too much work!!

    Anyway, sorry I probably posted the longest comment on earth. I should've just e-mailed you!

    Oh, about our pictures... my friend said there's a bad photographer at Yuen Lui and she ended up having to do re-takes. She loved the girl who did her re-takes, so I'm going to call today to request her. What should we do if it's HIM and it's unavoidable?? Oh, and I'm having a REALLY hard time deciding between having Aidan look babyish or like a little boy. He'll have plenty of years to wear plaid shirts, button-ups, etc., but that's what Chad loves. Or I could just put him in a cute onesie, which he'll never wear in pictures again! Hmmmm...

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  6. You totally crack me up!!! And since I've been surfing the internet so much on how to change up the look of my blog, I found that you can go to a 3 column layout with directions at this site: http://www.thecutestblogontheblock.com/secret.php?id=3

    I used the directions, and it worked, I just decided I didn't want to do three column right now afterall! :) I've spent way too much time in bloggy land lately - haha.

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  7. Too funny I am glad you had a better experience! Talky people should not become dental hygienists

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  8. That is so funny and so true! I always seem to get the same thing - maybe we go to the same place! LOL

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  9. How funny!!!! Bless your heart! Well at least you had a good experience and you will have him for at least 1 more cleaning!!

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  10. Nothing worse that then dentist, except for the hygenist. That stinks! Earplugs anyone?

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  11. I can't stand when anyone at any kind of appointment like that talks to me. Hygienist, Massage Therapist, Hair Stylist...this is my TIME OFF, people! =)

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  12. LOLOLOLOLOLO!!! That was histerical! I agree totally! And that also sounds like a NOT ME...if you ask me! Great post! Needed a good laugh!

    PS, I tagged you on my blog...go get it!!!HA!

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  13. So glad you spoke up and get Mr. Quiet instead of Ms. Jabberjaw! I have a similar quandary at my dentists office. I finally started requesting the nice quiet hygienist instead of the gabby lady with the mini TV playing soap operas - yikes! :)

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  14. LOL!

    I remember this post and it's just as funny this time too. And too funny that two links were about dentists this week! Is there some kind of conspiracy?

    Thanks for linking up - I needed a good laugh!

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  15. Oh wait... you could always do like me and pretend you're deaf. You can't lipread from behind those masks, so maybe that would quiet her up??? ;)

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  16. Ahhh, clueless people...I know there's some in every bunch...but why does there have to be so many of them??? And WHY do they all seem to find ME?? Thank goodness you got the guy and hopefully you've had him every time since!!

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  17. Ha! You do sound like a stalker!!!
    LOL!

    And the guy probably thinks you have a crush on him ")

    So funny!!!

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What you talkin' bout Willis??